What would a trip to Colorado be without dinner at Casa Bonita? Well, a lot healthier, that’s one thing. But not very fun!
After watching the South Park Casa Bonita episode we decided we couldn’t skip out on a trip to the infamous Casa Bonita. Where tacky decor, terrible entertainment, and appalling food all collide into an experience that can be best described as “interesting”.
Situated in a rather run-down strip mall, the large pink facade lets you know you’ve arrived. Like all the squealing teenagers who arrive on buses, we opted for a photo in front of the iconic structure.
Once inside, you’re herded like cattle into lines with absolutely no end in site. Like the line for a ride at Disney, just when you think you’re almost there, you turn another corner only to discover that you’re nowhere near the end. During this time you have plenty of time to second-guess your decision to actually eat there, but the employees will tell you that not eating isn’t an option–all customers must order, and all adults must order off the adult menu.
After forking over nearly $20 for each meal, you’ll be given something that only slightly resembles food as you know it. If you’re lucky, it might even be lukewarm.
During your meal you’ll be entertained by short skits, put on by employees who speak too quickly to understand, into microphones and sound systems that don’t work properly, so at best you’ll be able to infer the overall tone of the skit, which often involves someone being pushed off the ledge into the water below.
Which, is actually kinda neat, considering it’s all inside a restaurant, but the random children clamoring around and practically on your table (assuming you’re in a prime spot) will ruin any view you may have wished you had of the performances and become incredibly awkward as you try not to touch someone else’s child but that child is touching you.
If the whole place felt a bit cleaner, it would be pretty neat.
If you make it out of Casa Bonita without food poisoning or inadvertently elbowing someone’s child in the face (as they clamor around you), the dinner can be recorded as a success! If not, well, I’m sorry.
So should you go to Casa Bonita? Of course. I’ve truly never been anywhere like it.
But should you eat there? Hell no.